“Humor”
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A Misunderstanding.
Me: I didn’t know this building allowed adult content production. The Girl: What do you mean? Me: Above 52, there’s the Pornhub floor. The Girl: Baby, I think that stands for Penthouse. Me: Then it’s named for the magazine, and my point remains. 2 Continue reading
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Last night I salvaged the remnants of a rotisserie chicken for ramen I was preparing.
Disemboweling a corpse with my bare hands… that’s the most metal thing I’ve done in a decent amount of time. NP: The Haunted, “Hell is Wasted on the Dead”. 2 Continue reading
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“Talking to you is like being high, but in a bad way”.
…said The Girlfriend Tuesday afternoon, after I cracked a particularly bad joke. Mind you, this was right before she went out to get me an iced coffee while I took a shower, so I suppose I must take the occasional bad with the good and generous. 2 Continue reading
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The Story of My Life.
Image Description: a wooden step-stool with a label that states “Please watch your step. Or at least fall humorously” with a pictogram of a falling person. 2 Continue reading
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A Normal Conversation Between Normal People.
EC, watching The Four Seasons: “He can afford it, he’s a millionaire. Hedge funds…” Me: “He doesn’t look like a landscaper.“ (beat) EC: Glares. Friendship is lovely. 3 Continue reading
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I must be reined in.
The Girlfriend: So, what am I feeling for you right now? Me: Unbridled love. The Girlfriend: What does bridled love feel like? Me: I don’t know, you’d have to ask a horse. 2 Continue reading